Monday, September 27, 2004

Stuff you're never gonna read

This is the stuff you're never read. You're never gonna read it because you don't care, and you won't look, and I stopped writing, and if I stop writing, why should you keep reading? Well, you shouldn't, so by all means, don't read this.

Don't read it because you can't answer my questions, and don't read it because I can't answer yours. Don't read about my life, because it's not yours, and you only care about it as much as it is like yours, and my life isn't like yours, because you are confused and don't know what to do, and what you want, and where to go, and I know all of those things. I've got it all figured out. I've got all the answers. If I wanted to, I could write them all in a book, and the book would be called, "How To Do Everything Write and Never Make Mistakes", but I'm not going to, because that's not part of the plan. Writing books about living life isn't the right answer -- one down, eight jillion more to go -- figured it out yet?

So I know all the ansewrs. You don't know all the answers. Maybe you don't know any. But, if you read this, you would know one: "Don't write all the answers down in a book". But, no one reads this, so I was right -- you don't know any of the answers. Where does that leave us? Well, it leaves you with questions, and it's gonna leave me with a sick job, hot wife, a phatty sailboat to sail around the world...or is it? I can't tell you, because then I would be giving away too many answers, and I've already given away one.

I was going to reveal something else at the end of this post. Something big. A big secret, a trick I've learned. It doen't always work, but about 2 out of 3 times it will let you know what to do, and the other third, you will just have to use your judgement, which is what you should be using now. But, when I thought about it, I decided you might be happier without the trick. It will save you time, make you richer, happier, more productive, smarter, better looking, more confident and friendlier, but it's kind of like cheating, and if you do it, you'll have to live with that for the rest of your happy, perfect, successful, fulfilling life. As for me, I'm just going to keep chugging away, waiting and watching, not caring about a thing in the world, because I know all the answers and you don't know shit.

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